Creating a safe haven: Strategies for supporting foster children with complex trauma

Foster care is a crucial service that provides temporary, safe care for children and young people who are unable to live with their birth families. Many children in foster care have experienced various forms of traumatic situations such as abuse and neglect, which can have a significant impact on their mental health and wellbeing. When becoming a foster carer, it’s important to understand the complex needs of children who have been through abuse and upheaval and how to create a safe, supportive environment for them to live in. Those considering going ahead should keep reading to find out more about some of the strategies that can be used to support foster children with complex trauma.

What is complex trauma?

Complex trauma is a term used to describe the experience of multiple, chronic traumatic events. For children in care, these will often occur within the context of a family, where their primary caregiver has not been able to meet their needs or keep them safe, or they have been the person causing harm.. Experiences like these can have a significant impact on the development and mental health of the child. Children and adults with complex trauma may struggle with emotional regulation, trusting others and forming healthy attachments.

A foster carer can provide a nurturing environment for the child to overcome their past experiences and go on to thrive. Anyone wondering if is something that they are interested in doing for a child may want to consider therapeutic fostering.

Creating a stable and safe environment

One of the most important strategies when it comes to supporting foster children with complex trauma is to ensure that they have a secure, stable environment. This kind of background can often leave children feeling chronically overwhelmed, anxious and unsafe. Their nervous system is on high alert; they have developed to constantly signal danger at things that are normal to everyone else. As a foster carer, providing a predictable and protected environment is the best thing one can do to help facilitate a sense of calm and allow a foster child to regulate their nervous system and learn to manage their anxious feelings. Establishing routines and boundaries, providing a comfortable physical space for the child, and being consistent in responses to them are all key to the process.

Foster families should also work with the child’s social worker, therapist and other professionals to develop a plan that’s designed to meet the child’s specific needs. This will consider their history, triggers that may cause distress, strategies for managing challenging behaviour, and trying to translate their hidden feelings.

Supporting emotional regulation

When children have experienced complex trauma, they may struggle with emotional regulation. This can lead to them showing big feelings through the way they behave. For example, they may be argumentative, disruptive, distracted or withdrawn, or another survival behaviour that’s related to their fight, flight, freeze or collapse response – and all can be challenging for foster parents.  As a foster carer, the most important thing is to understand that these behaviours are not “bad” but are rather the child responding to overwhelming emotions that they do not yet know how to communicate. Often, it’s actually an unconscious decision to act in a certain way – it’s how they’ve adapted to survive in the past. The best thing to do is support them with strategies to help bring them out of a heightened or shutdown state, before trying help them find better ways to communicate their emotions.

One way to do this is to provide them with a safe space in the home where they can go if they are feeling stressed or overwhelmed. This can be their own bedroom, or another place where they will not be disturbed. It should be quiet and comfortable, and have sensory items like stuffed animals, soft blankets or fidget toys.

Teaching a foster child how to recognise and label their emotions is another healthy and helpful strategy. It’s very important to acknowledge all of the child’s emotions as valid and make sure that they know it’s ok to feel sad, angry or upset. They should be encouraged to express these emotions in healthier ways, such as by journaling, creating art or exercising.

Building attachment and trust

Children with a traumatic background may struggle with trusting others and forming healthy attachments, which can make it difficult for them to form relationships and friendships with others. As a foster carer, it’s crucial to recognise the importance of trust and attachment throughout the child’s development and take steps to encourage them to trust their new family and build a strong relationship.

Positive reinforcement is one ideal strategy that can be used to earn the trust of a foster child and help them develop a healthy attachment to their caregiver. Adults should praise them for positive behaviour and never be shy of letting them know how proud they are of them whenever they accomplish something. It’s also important to celebrate even the smallest of successes and let them know that all the hard work they are putting in has been noticed. They need to know consistently that they are loved, valued and cared for.

Foster carers must be persistent and patient during this process. Building trust and a healthy attachment with a child who has been through trauma can take time, and probably won’t happen overnight. But with consistency and care, it’s possible to show them that there are people who can be relied on to be there for them, even when things aren’t easy.

Support education and development

Trauma doesn’t just affect mental health – it can seep into every aspect of life, including education and development, causing delays. Supporting the child’s educational and developmental needs to overcome this is essential for foster carers. This could mean working with their school to develop an individualised education plan, and communicating regularly with educators and other professionals to ensure that the relevant needs are met.

It’s also worth supporting a foster child’s development by providing further opportunities for play, exploration and imagination. They should be encouraged to engage in activities like reading, writing, drawing or crafts in order to promote creativity and curiosity. It’s also great to allow them to try out new experiences, such as exploring nature, visiting museums or trying a new sport.

Complex trauma can affect children in many ways. As a foster carer, it’s important to understand how a particular individual’s experiences might have impacted them, and the strategies can be used to establish a safe base for beginning to heal.

The editorial unit